BODY LANGUAGE SECRETS: POWER (on SKY ONE)
This show was BRILLIANT I learnt so much, and it left me wanting to pursue time learning more about body language.
- 'From the Boardroom to the Bedroom POWER dictates everything we do'
It stars three psychologists, Expert in Neuroscience (Dr Jack Lewis), Social Science Expert (Anjula Mutanda) and Body language Expert (Dr Peter Collett)
They showed a lot of footage from politicians and how they communicate. And the techniques they use, which can be transferred to people like you and me.
From starts with meeting someone and starting with a simple handshake, a lot is said without words.
They showed a clip from top politicians: Barak Obama, Gordon Brown and a few others meeting in England.
Gordon Brown (Being the host) went round the room, meeting and greeting people and seemed friendly. HOWEVER they pointed out, look how Obama remains rooted in one position, (He lets people come to him NOT the other way round)
And with something as simple as a handshake, Obama went first offering his hand, however only putting out his forearm keeping his elbow locked to his side, meaning the other person had to REACH OUT to shake OBAMA'S hand, giving the signs of Obama is the top dog, you must go above and beyond to meet him.
So TOP TIPS I LEARNT FROM THIS CLIP:
- Handshakes: go first but keep ELBOW locked next to side, and let the other person OVER REACH
- Simply standing on one spot GIVES OFF A POWER VIBE people who aren't in charge run around etc Let people come to YOU.
- If someone offers their hand FIRST to claim the power back, during the shake using your other hand pat/hold their shaking hand near the elbow (Signalling I'm in control of you)
- THE POWER PAT, when walking or leaving a room, a simple friendly pat on the back/shoulder can easy come across as friendly, but signals 'YOU'RE THE TOP DOG' and effectively saying 'GOOD BOY' to the recipient.
The next clip, showed Bill Clinton and George Bush walking then posing for photos, and George Bush not wanting to be up staged as he seemed nervous, starting mimicking every move Bill Clinton did.
I.e If Bill waved to the cameras George would wave.
Also celebrities they said use similar tricks...
'The Power Walk' swinging the arms, taking up more space when you walk draws the eye in, and shows your importance.
If our brain believes our power status our body will naturally give off this impression.
Another clip then moved onto Gordon Brown giving a speech:
When talking using his hands, he shows his knuckles when gesturing, (the knuckles being hard, giving off a hard impression, no nonsense approach)
In 2007 Forward thinking 2007 during a speech he used forward thinking and positive words, yet in 2009 his speech was reflective and using negative words, (can't, try, not, stop and never).
In only two years, from 2007 a man who was powerful, and believed in himself, 2 years on shows a completely different outlook.
Even during the speech in 2009, taking a small step back from the podium mid speech, seems nothing (but is reflecting him, wanting to distance himself from his speech, and giving off signs of doubt, which the audience un-kowningly pick up on.)
Key points delivering a speech as a politician:
- Speak slowly and clearly
- Lower your voice to sound authoritative
- Conceal any suggestions of anxiety or self doubt
They showed a typical work environment and followed the owner for the day and sat in on a boardroom meeting:
During a boardroom meeting, the boss and his son sit at the ENDS of the table (which are the most powerful seats if you will) They also point out that the Boss is the last one to enter the room and to sit down. (Showing his time is more precious than anyone else's) Known as the 'Structure of Attention)
They go onto explain you can work out whose in charge 'Through patterns of gaze' Now sitting at the top ends of the table, people tend to hold their focus their at the Boss.
But when other people talk, people listening, their eyes tend to drift away.
3 reasons why people touch their face:
1- To draw attention to themselves.
2- To comfort themselves
3- To show they DON'T want to be the next speaker
Even to people nodding their heads, when the boss speaks, people tend to nod their heads to make it look like their listening and agreeing, and also to appease the Boss, however when others speak the Boss rarely nods his head.
(The Boss during an employee speaking then puts his hands behind his head)
Putting their hands behind their heads, can be a sign of comforting themselves but they also do this as a dominance display, broadening their chests, positioning the hands in preparation for attack. (This is a real powerful display)
Also at the end of the meeting, the Boss leaves FIRST, again confirming his time is most precious and he is the most important person in the room.
Top Tip:
- Where you sit in a meeting can also be important, as predominately sitting to the RIGHT on someone gives you their RIGHT ear, and information is processed on the LEFT side of the brain which receives the information through the RIGHT EAR.
ALPHA FEMALES:
Opra Wimprey the most powerful woman in the world and a multi billionaire, many believe Barak Obama only won with the backing of Oprah.
- 21st centery celebrities hold the power over politictians at the moment.
POWER DRESSING:
WHAT WE WEAR GIVES OFF A VERY POWERFUL MESSAGE
(Where first impressions last)
Three interviews were conducted and analysed,
'If you look dated the message you give off is your thinking is out of date, your not up to speed with whats happening in the world today. You will judge somebody based on what you see, and we can't help that, its an innate response.'
Hence why celebrities employ stylists to make sure they get it RIGHT.
One of the most powerful outfits for a man, is a dark suit, white shirt and red tie,
- Dark Suit
- White shirt - reflecting light onto his face
- Red tie - drawing attention onto the lips meaning we listen to what they say
- A jacket is the most powerful piece in a woman's wardrobe in a professional situation, lose it and you can lose power, which was demonstrated on the third candidate.
"Black and white is a hard look to pull off as the impression is your interviewing for a waitress job.
If women OVER FEMINISE the way they look, they LOSE their credibility, because a man will then see you as a female person they might find attractive and not a credible employee who will do the job."
The most important thing in an interview, is what comes out of your mouth, you don't want the interviewer distracted by what you're wearing.
Some More Facts:
When you've got power someone is always trying to take it from you!
- The ring finger being longer than your fore finger. Tho this is an indication, hard work and ambition work best.
Height is also an indicator in america the average height being 5"9 nearly 60% fortune 500 companies are over 6 foot tall.
- Last 100 years all american presidents have been above average height and USUALLY the taller candidate wins.
If you're not tall and powerful you should work with people smaller than you.
- Power is sexy, women are drawn to this. Men tend to find powerful women intimidating, the reason why women find powerful men attractive is because he has influence, the influence to give a woman what she needs
- Men can find women attractive and it ends there.
Women however can find a man who is powerful MORE attractive than someone with looks, this isn't because she's a gold digger but because its the power to support and look after them while raising a family because were primates, and written into our D.N.A
- Powerful men are sexy, powerful women are scary
SUMMARY
- Powerful people can use the space around them to command attention. (the power walk)
- The powerful use body language to convey there status
- They command the space around them
- And use their self-belief to make others follow their lead
- Appropriate clothes are vital to making the right impression
- Appearance can convey so mcuh more about your abilities than your C.V
- Remember it's the quiet ones you need to watch
- The truly powerful ones make people come to them
- Say very little and often move even less
- Don't be afraid to stand out from the crowd, it's often the risk takers that aquire real power
- Even where you sit compared to your Boss can have a massive impact on your career
- Its all about self-belief and if its only an act it will convince those around you and eventually you too!
- Though alpha male work places are very common, its actually fact that MOST people typically want to be LED.
- When delivering a speech, dark suits, white shirts and red ties are best.
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